Would You Believe...
March 2, 2017
That mainstream media only missed it by “that” much? So how much is that exactly?
The
CIA’s old tripping over its own two-feet trick is getting a little
played. What they call “tradecraft” became a public spectacle, after the
fact, abducting Abu Omar
in Milan February 2003. The 20 some agents involved managed not to get
caught red-handed. They were none too quiet about it though and left a
trail behind an asthmatic lapdog with a cold could have followed.
Italian authorities were not inclined to turn a blind eye to felonies on
their turf. They indicted the culprits trying them in abstentia.One was agent Sabrina de Souza.
She made the mistake of going to Portugal post-conviction and became
liable for extradition. 22 other company men and women may be in the
same boat if they find themselves within the long arm of Rome. These
highly trained covert operatives dragged a few Italians down with
them too. Details of the incident bring to mind a lot of questions that
would be damned unwelcome down at Langley. The trusty 4th estate is hardly asking any of them.
We
all know spies get caught once in a while. If they didn’t that whole
“dangers I have known” mystique would lose its tingle. But why the hell
do you need a team bigger than both sides on a football field to take
one lousy guy for a ride? What’s worse is it looks like every last one
of them got made pulling it off. Keep it simple stupid is a principle
American high command turns its nose up at. These spooks must be
watching all the wrong flicks. Forget their usual faves: James Bond,
Matt Helm, Mission Impossible and Inspector Clouseau. When this crack unit crossed the Atlantic they should have had The Godfather on a continual loop.
We
live in a country where over 70,000 murders went unsolved since that
operation went down. Can’t anybody as stealthy as a common criminal get
hired by the federal government? Shoving a single unsuspecting, unarmed
man into a van on a Milan street corner doesn’t sound like rocket
surgery to me. Walk around a city block and you can probably turn out
three people who are up to the job. Nobody in big league news, from Fox
to the NYT, is finding fault with the execution of this mission. The
pretense of double-nought spy journeyman-ship will be maintained by the
press. And nobody’s asking why the company gets away with deploying
Jethros.
People
are way too used to government professionals that can’t compete with
amateurs. They don’t even laugh or get riled anymore. Team America is an
only slight exaggeration. We are expected to remain in awe of the free
world’s saviors as they face the most underwhelming odds imaginable. No
matter what these characters do, in the real world, some people still
are. What’s in front of them on large and small screens is suspending
reality to psychotic degrees. The entertainment industry is just as
responsible as their kinfolk in news. Hollywood finds irony too
challenging. They are neither confident of their ability to depict it
nor of finding a wide audience that can pick up on it.
Over
60 years ago James Thurber pointed out that media follows Washington’s
lead using the word “security” where “insecurity” applies. Things
haven’t improved. Any idea of security is the last thing on NSA
minds. Insecurity is a thriving industry with an obsessive aversion to
risk. It’s an attitude that inevitably creates unforeseen perils at
unsustainable costs. One priority they haven’t lost sight of is a pop
cultural appeal. Episodic TV is a profit making arm of nationalistic
propaganda. And when it comes to creative thinking producers are just as
gutless as insecure bureaucrats in Washington, DC. They are passing up a
tidal wave of comic opportunity to glorify the cloak and dagger
boondoggling racket.
Just
about every school girl and boy dreams of jet-setting to European
wonderlands for high adventure. How hard is it to convince yourself that
you aren’t drinking a high-dollar bottle of Barolo just to enjoy the
piedmontese view? Oh no, it is simply what is necessary to save the free
world. Paying in Euros to avoid leaving a paper trail? Well, who the
heck thinks of everything? Scenarios may exist where cover
requires American operatives to maintain a high profile and endure plush
accommodations. But that sure looks like the opposite of what would
have worked well in taking down Abu Omar. There is a lot of stuff
extraordinary about extraordinary rendition besides the rendition.
George Kennan, who knew a thing or two about the subject, said:
A
foreign policy aimed at the achievement of total security is the one
thing I can think of that is entirely capable of bringing this country
to a point where it will have no security at all.
Mel
Brooks and Buck Henry probably weren’t thinking quite that deep or
lapidary when they created Get Smart. That doesn’t mean the two weren’t
closer to the reality of covert operations than the wunderkind
brainstorming from Langley and Los Angeles today. The misadventures of
Max and 99 look a lot more prescient than anything I’ve seen on the tube
in quite some time. We could use a man with some pull and cojones in
TV-land. A creator who can combine the comic brio of Brooks and Henry
with the worldview of Kennan needs to step up. It might be the last
thing that can bring couch potatoes holding clickers, along with that
bloated hierarchy on the Potomac, kicking and screaming, back to their
senses.
Tim Hartnett [send him mail] was born in Alexandria, Va. He works as a contractor and sometime bartender in Northern Va. Past columns include "What is the Conservative Movement" and "The Clothes Make the G-Man."
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